Blanking out Mentally

I wonder if people go through the same things that I go about dealing with the drudgery of life . I find myself listening to a conversation and not hearing a word . In a flash am out if it or back into it. Do you also feel the urge to be left alone and not be surrounded by any human ??? Off late I find myself preferring to be alone and not seeing a single soul who I wanna interact with . Maybe I just need some time to know myself . Maybe I just need to stop pushing myself to meet the expectations of people ....maybe I just need some help ??

Am i insane or is the world ?

Well ! This question always pops up in my mind more than often and I still find myself invariably asking myself at every single time .
Why do I find peace being a loner, happy having a beer by myself, tweeting or maybe just reading something on the net.
I wasn't like that some years ago ... Why do things look so different these days ? Has three years made so much of a difference in my life ?
Has the world taught me enough so I don't feel the need to connect ?
Just a song or a word is enough to  scramble to my shell ?
Getting older has played its role here ?
Exactly what is it that has happened which I fail to understand yet find myself totally at peace at any given situation whether its sadness , happiness , a moment of joy, a panic situation or a job completed at its best ....
Nothing has changed ....kuch bhi nahi badla par hum badalgaye ... Par kyon ?

Naughty at 40 or Knotty at 40 ?

Thanks to the social media networking as the college group managed to catch up on each other more like hunting each other . First Facebook and finally the dreaded Whatsapp ! As the group began my fear of turning old stared at me right into the face . Had that many years gone by ? My classmates children all grown up and ready to get married while I was struggling to keep up with my 11 year old daughter ! Chandrika my bestest buddy now a financial wizard in Dubai , Alka who was a sweet docile woman now handling two grown up children , Brinda who looks more beautiful now than ever could still give Aishwarya Rai a run for her money , Sangeetha who was the mischievous one continues to remain one with her hilarious theories and one liners . Ruphina ,Raji ,Veena the quiet ones in college all turned into such strong women in life .... Me "Gullu" as am referred to still by the pet name continues to be the brat till date suddenly realized that the world is such a beautiful place .
Each one of them so young at heart and yet so mature .....
Life has taught us all to struggle sink and yet learn to keep afloat .
Right now the hilarious conversation happening is about all of us owning a shop on one street with the business of their strength . Beer to lingerie was the topic of business and each one a role to play to promote the other shops.
Friends truly keep you smiling and there you are ready to face your fears boldy all over again .

God or plain trust ?

Parked my car at my usual parking spot at work and just glanced towards my right and saw this very interesting sight . A so called mentally challenged person was talking to the idol of Lord Ganeshji . I was taken aback. Never witnessed such a situation or scene till date.... I wanted to simply walk away towards the gate as I was already late but then decided to actually see this and not worry about work . As I stood watching the person he took a rose which was on the idol kissed it and was hugging the idol ,talking and laughing and I could swear that the idol almost talked to the person . Pangs of jealously went through me as I knew I couldn't do what I witnessed . Asked myself if he was the mentally challenged person or was it me ? Could I connect to the supernatural force as fluently as this man could ? Are we sane or pretend to be sane . Walked away feeling sad , lost and wondering about my existing life and if I was really successful when it came to connecting with the guy up above !